“Can we talk here?”

Photo by Hannah Strayer, Storytellers Abroad participant

In the words of Joan Rivers, “Can we talk here?”

First, if you lost your job and are looking for a new job, go and have lunch or coffee with a successful pro. Take the time to ask the pro, “If you were I, what would you do?”

Also, scrape together enough money to pay for that lunch or coffee because it will most likely be the best money you have spent in a long time.

Second, learn to listen, try to hear what people need, and know how to position yourself as the solution to their problems. Too often, new freelancers do all they can to tell a potential client what they do. As a result, they just talked themselves out of any work. If you talk about how you are a great square and they needed a round solution, you can see how you lost the job. It is better to listen and hear they need a round object and figure out how you could be a round object.

Third, pause and think if you get a call about a job opportunity. Your objective should be to get the job offer and decide if you are interested. Don’t be the guy who is turning it down before hearing all about a job. Now all the reasons you have for turning something down may disappear if you just shut up and listen. There is an excellent chance they may offer you more money or something else that helps address your needs, but because you are so bright and already knew why this isn’t a good fit just lost a great opportunity.

Fourth, let’s say you screwed up on anything; call that person and apologize. If you don’t know what you did wrong, call them and tell them I think I made a mistake with you and I don’t know what I did, but I would love to learn from you, so I don’t make that mistake again. Your willingness to eat some humble pie might reopen a closed door.

Fifth, many people could go to etiquette classes for adults. You may sabotage your efforts, from how you dress to how you eat your food, for example. The more you know, the better you can be at shaping your brand.

Here are some key factors that prohibit professionals or an organization from achieving its potential level of success include:

Poor verbal and nonverbal skills towards other employees or business partners
Rude and distracting behavior in the office and during meetings
Failing to appreciate employees for their contributions and poor communication
Inappropriate attire and inappropriate behavior
Poor manners on the phone and via email
Embarrassing business and social faux pas

My wife has educated me extraordinarily on some of what I call overlooked social faux pas. In addition, she has helped me so much in navigating etiquette.

The proverbs of Solomon, son of David, king of Israel: To know wisdom and instruction, to understand words of insight, to receive instruction in wise dealing, in righteousness, justice, and equity; to give prudence to the simple, knowledge and discretion to the youth— Let the wise hear and increase in learning, and the one who understands obtain guidance, …
Proverbs 1:1-33 ESV

Now we all still make mistakes, so learn from them. I hope this helps you think about your objective of finding work.

Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time. Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.
Colossians 4:5-6 ESV

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